Flying Tomato Italian Grill

Where:  10224 198th St. E., Graham, 253.875.0770

Hours: 11:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Monday-Thursday, 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m. Friday, noon-10 p.m. Saturday, noon-9 p.m. Sunday

Cuisine: American Italian

Scene: Family-friendly, casual dining

Drinkies: Full bar, Italian sodas, standard non-alcoholic beverages

Prices: $8.25-$20.99

ANNOUNCER: Sometimes I poke fun at Graham - how far away it is (bordering Idaho), how difficult and endless the journey there on Meridian can feel (think the Road to Hana), and how stuck in the '90s it may seem (acid washed jeans). But business owners are taking chances in the small pockets. One such pocket is set back from bustling Meridian in a blink-and-you-miss-it shopping plaza right before Graham's one main intersection. Flying Tomato Italian Grill has taken a page from Claim Jumper Restaurants' book of doing business by serving gigantic portions that ensure Americans will continue to outweigh other citizens of the world. Casual and family friendly in appearance and menu options, median prices of $16 to $19 still may dictate dining here on special occasions only.

JAKE: The first time we came here we didn't stay. We stood in the hostess area waiting to be seated for seven very long minutes before giving up and going next door to Thai Mekong. You remember that, Jason? We timed it; it was seven minutes. This time we were greeted and seated immediately. The room was warm and smelled of wonderful, savory garlic. Only a few other tables had patrons at the peak dining time of 7 p.m.  Our blonde server told us if we ordered entrees our appetizers would be half off. Score.

JASON: Like we need a nudge toward gluttony. The flatbread with cambazola cheese may be the best $4.50 ever spent. Though the presentation seemed jankie, the taste was delicious. Four black plastic ramekins held roasted garlic in olive oil, deep brown tangy balsamic vinegar, butter loaded with red pepper chunks and orange in hue, and a hunk of blue veined cambazola cheese. Blondie suggested we take a bit of each, cream it together on a side plate and smear it on the flatbread. She was right - übergood. But how bad could it possibly be when the ingredients are terrific and complement each other so well?

JAKE: I know seafood can be fishy, true, but it makes me leery when it smells that strong. Donatello's sculptured mushrooms were stuffed with a blend of shrimp and crab and served hot in an orange-hued Alfredo sauce that was cloyingly salty. You loved it and mopped bread through it, but to me it seemed like it was being used to disguise seafood that was possibly past its peak. That freaks me out.

JASON: At home you eat food you leave out on the counter overnight, but at Flying Tomato you get weird if there's too much sauce. Huh. Though I really, really wanted saltimbocca, I wanted to try a bunch of stuff and opted for the Italian vacation platter. It was needlessly mammoth in size yet disappointing in flavor. Mediocre is a good way to describe it and pretty much sums up all of the food. Do I think that's harsh? No, I think it's accurate. Two cups of spaghetti noodles (why so much?), a baseball-sized meatball, an overcooked breaded chicken breast, and a square of lasagna bigger than four iPhones stacked atop each other drowned in bland marinara - the whole platter could not have been less appetizing. Thumbs down.

JAKE: Yeah, it was pretty weak. Sort of like how I feel about music: "Just because it's loud doesn't mean it sounds good." That can work here, too. "Just because the portion is huge doesn't make the food taste good." I'd rather have a smaller portion that was crafted better. My entree worked out pretty well for me though. Subtle sweetness in plentiful honey smoked salmon and a creamy Alfredo sauce were my ticket to Tasty Town. Curious though, the Alfredo didn't seem anything like the Alfredo on the mushrooms. Fettuccini was nicely done, thankfully.

JASON: It's no secret that I love dessert the way a hormone high woman loves chocolate. If it's sweet I want it. That said, I would not eat the chocolate cake again. It was moist, yes. It was chocolate, yes. But strangely, it wasn't delicious. It was just sort of regular, blah, and oddly it was two whole pieces next to each other on a plate. I don't know what to say.

JAKE: You already did. Mammoth, disappointing and mediocre.