It’s that time of year again. Y’know, when we start a new one. I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to be done with 2008. For many of us, an unofficial component of the New Year celebration involves making unofficial oaths to transcend shortcomings, self-improve and grow. Until we come up with a less stifling and boring term, we call them resolutions.



To help jump start your journey toward self-renewal, the Weekly Volcano has carefully selected a few New Year’s Eve activities to get you in the mood. For the sake of simplicity, we’ve chosen activities that will occur within a couple of blocks of one another. They’re all brought to you by the good folks at First Night Tacoma-Pierce County.



Held in more than 100 cities around the globe, First Night propaganda describes the family of events as “an opportunity for friends and families to say farewell to the old year and hello to the new one in a family-friendly, alcohol-free, and, most of all, fabulously fun environment.”



“My New Year’s resolution is to make sure we have a First Night every year,” says First Night director and pioneer Bennett Thurmon.



First Night went off in Tacoma each year for nearly a decade before organizers were forced to pull the plug in 2006. Thanks to some hardcore hustling by a small group of locals and a few generous souls, First Night made a strong comeback last year, and is on its way to being stronger and more sustainable than you ever imagined, says Thurmon.

“We’re really cranking it up, and we’ve got everything in place,” says Thurmon. “With everything that’s been going on, I think everybody is ready for a big party on New Year’s Eve.”



This year, First Night will carry a circus theme, with lots of jugglers, fire dancers, face painting and a thousand clown noses ready to be distributed to party-goers. By my math, fire plus circus equals a good time, any way you slice it.



So, now that Bennett has the ball rolling, get ready to resolve, Tacoma. It’s real easy: chant, “Tonight is the first night of the rest of my life,” then go to a few of the following events.



Here we go:

FLAB-BE-GONE

It’s everyone’s favorite promise to break — lose some of those winter pounds. Between Thanksgiving feasts, Christmas dinners, and a general lack of desire to move that sets in during Pacific Northwest winters, you’re probably five or six pounds over your ideal weight, which our cryo-culture has deemed unacceptable.



Pigs

6:30 and 7:30 p.m. at the Rialto Theater — So, one of the best ways to shed some pounds is to cut out the swine. Aside from being among the most disgusting foods available on the open market, pork is certain to keep you from reaching that weight loss goal. For those of you addicted to eating swine, I’ve got the cure. Go see Valentine’s Performing Pigs at the Rialto Theater. These little f’ers were hot enough to land a spot on Oprah, and they’re so cute you’ll never want to eat pig again. Seriously, they dance, they golf, they bowl and they skate. If the cuteness of these little guys doesn’t encourage you to swear off swine, all the pig puns, like “ham dunking,” will certainly curb your appetite.



Samba-cise

6 p.m. at the Pantages Theater — I don’t remember where I read this, but dancing is a great way to burn calories. If you’re not into pigs and want to get down right on New Year’s night, head over to the Pantages Theater at 6 p.m. to see VamoLa. The samba-inspired dance and drum troupe fuses reggae, maracatu, samba and dirty old noggin knockin’ beats into its celebratory, choreographed gyrations, and has a penchant for involving audience members.

REKINDLE YOUR LOVE LIFE

Let’s list all the things in 2008 that have likely murdered your sex life: constant anxiety about losing your job; constant anxiety about losing your house; constant anxiety about the slim possibility that Sarah Palin could become vice president; record gasoline prices; Tom Cruise; spending all your time blogging; and two New Kids on the Block concerts. More recently, much like driving, no one from around these parts knows how to do it in the snow. We’ve endured quite a little cavalcade of libido-killers this year, folks.



Pyrosutra’s got that fire, son!

Whether they mean to or not, Pyrosutra is likely to recharge your waning Yang. This world-renowned troupe of performers blends breakdancing, bellydancing, stiltwalking, acrobatics, martial arts, fire eating and all sorts of other pyrotechnics into a dizzying swirl that is sure to tickle your subconscious centers of desire. Sure, they use words like “provocative,” but lets be honest … it’s like a PG-13 version of the Bacchanalia … on fire. What’s even sexier is the organization’s dedication to conservation projects in Costa Rica. Expect a toned-down version of what you’d see at, say, Burning Man, but have no doubt — this is the answer to your despondent partner’s prayers.



Pyrosutra will perform at various places during First Night celebrations. There’s no time slot for this one. Apparently they’ll be doing it all night.



Take the pain away

10 p.m. at Theater on the Square — The Painkillers will begin to weave a web of sound that is equal parts psychedelia, honky-tonk and Ed Wood. Seriously, it’s weird in the most unbelievably awesome way. Maybe it’s the Culture-inspired echo-flange fades, or the lengths to which The Painkillers go to make their music creep under your skin, but this is perfect music for strobe-lit, back-room, choking-on-smoke, David Lynch-style flesh mingling. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me.

EXPAND YOUR CULTURAL HORIZONS

It’s an increasingly popular resolution — get some culture. For those who want to take it more seriously than the average weekend tourist — for those who want more than the cryo-packaged, easy to swallow museum experience — there are few better ways than to lose yourself in sound and movement inspired by people who do things you can’t imagine. You’ll have plenty of chances at First Night. Here are a few highlights:



Man of the world

6 p.m. at the Pythian Temple — Scott Cossu has such a diverse musical background that you can get your head all twisted trying to classify him. So don’t. Just know that he brings an extensive jazz, rhythm and blues repertoire, combined with classical music training and years of study in music from the Sudan, Thailand, China, Romania and Ecuador. You can make up a lot of ground here, as long as you don’t try and give what Cossu does a name.



Hurdy gurdy, rolly polly

9:30 p.m. at the Pythian Temple — The Over The Water Hurdy Gurdy Association is keeping the flame alive for an instrument that’s almost as misunderstood as the Theramin. A string instrument that evolved in Western Europe at the turn of the last millennium, the hurdy gurdy has been lost to everyone but a few die-hards (read: Donovan and the Butthole Surfers). The strange looking contraption produces long, droning tunes, and it kind of sounds like a bagpipe, which is even weirder. The Over Water Association counts some of the world’s pre-eminent Hurdy Gurdy makers and players. So if you ever wanted to be down with Hurdy Gurdy, now’s your chance.



Original Dankster

10:30 p.m. at the Pierce Transit Main Stage — Alex Duncan is not to be missed. If you haven’t seen him, shame on you. He plays Tacoma about every other day. Originally from the island of St. Kitts, Duncan is a performing machine, and has been for more than 10 years. Duncan changes up reggae, dancehall and Soca styles, and never misses a beat. Go see him. Trust me.



Right in the Zazou

7:30 p.m. at the Pierce Transit Main Stage — Zazou is an acoustic sextet (that means there’s six of’em) that draws inspiration from Django Reinhardt’s Jazz Manouche, Parisian accordion aires, tangos, Latin rhythms, American swing and a touch of Hawaiian something. Sometimes they even throw in a birdcall. If you can dance, go to this one.

GO LOCAL

Forgive me if I leave anyone out. I seriously drew these out of a hat. Tacoma has some amazing talent, and you all better recognize. Here’s a real short list:



Mark this Page       

6 p.m., Pierce Transit Main Stage — Deborah Page is an enigma. She plays with music like a cat plays with a mouse. She does this amazing funk, gothic, folk, rock thing that is truly unique. And her voice will cut right through you when she gets serious. If you haven’t seen her live, you have missed one of Tacoma’s greatest.



99 problems, and Girl Trouble ain’t one

11 p.m., Theater on the Square — Dale, Kahuna, Bon, and K.P. are Girl Trouble. Girl Trouble has been playing forever. Girl Trouble is still completely awesome. Girl Trouble is a lo-fi work of genius, and their songs will get stuck in your head. If you haven’t seen Girl Trouble at least twice, you suck.



Pony up

9 p.m., Theater on the Square — The first time I heard Daniel Blue sing, I was astounded. Jaw-slack, “where-the-f-did-this-guy-come-from” astounded. Yeah, he’s a poet, and a painter, and he designs some pretty fresh rags to wear. But his voice will eat up your insides. Daniel is what would have happened if Leonard Cohen had gotten Janis Joplin pregnant. Do not miss Motopony, Tacoma.



Geoff Kanick               

9:30 p.m., Club SOTA — Geoff Kanick is a magician, and is almost certainly on his way to owning stages in Vegas. He combines magic, juggling, and escape, bringing a fresh approach to classics, as well as producing his own. He’s funny as hell. This guy is no joke. Go see him before he disappears, and reappears in Nevada.