Large rusted coffee cans littered with old cigarette buts rest beneath the patio tables in Unicorn Sports Bar’s serene patio as I prepare to meet some friends for a sunny afternoon beer. Unicorn’s outdoor space is well crafted with accents including English Ivy, flowering plants, landscaped rock, and a towering waterfall. Wood fencing is built with plexi-glass windows in order to not deter from the beautiful view of Commencement Bay.

OK, now answer me this: From the description I just presented you with, this doesn’t sound like a dive bar, right? Wrong.

Hidden in a Ruston-area neighborhood, you’d never guess that Unicorn Sports Bar bustled nightly with long-time patrons and local barflies. Pool tables, dart boards, taco specials, an easy fried-food menu, old barstools, crazy flooring, and bar-top video games hand this place the dive bar card it was meant to be dealt.

Push your way through the stiff, wooden, salon-type bathroom doors and find yourself inside every woman’s Sharpie-scripted diary. With a couple of expected wall writings of “Mary so-and-so is a whore” type stuff, one can also find poetic advice, clever limericks, and personal compliments specifically concerning a person’s love for the Unicorn itself.

Don’t judge me. You would’ve stayed and read the walls yourself, and you know it.

A large refrigerated case houses plenty of bottled beer behind the counter, cold and ready to quench even the most discerning domestic beer tastes. I witnessed more than one variety of tomato-based tall-boy beverages. On tap the selection holds approximately six typical domesticated micro-brews such as Blue Moon and Widmere, and four true-to-life domestics. The real shit, like Budweiser.

By the way, has anyone ever told you what Budweiser really stands for? Please, allow me to educate: Because You Deserve What Every Individual Should Enjoy Regularly.

Unicorn Sports Bar

5302 N. 49th St., Ruston, 253.752.5939

Beer: Refreshing. Because I DO deserve it regularly.
Food: Fried stuff and burgers.
Bar Exam Dive Grade: A