The Swinos are Bobble Tiki’s kind of band. There’s simply no denying it.

Sure, Bobble Tiki could sit here and tell you he’s above bands like the Swinos. He could tell you he likes intricate song writing, Pet Sounds harmonies, layers and layers of instrumentation, and lyrics that read like Shakespeare (or at the very least, Marlowe), but declarations like that would fall flatter than 3-day-old 7UP.

Bobble Tiki’s a proud musical lowbrow. It doesn’t take much to get his foot a tappin’.  While Bobble Tiki’s taste gets him frowns when mingling in circles of music snobs and record collectors, he believes his easy-to-be-pleased ways make his life a whole lot sweeter.

Think about it. If a person is only happy with really, really good music — most of the time they’re disappointed. Bobble Tiki, on the other hand, can flip on nearly any radio station and hear a song he likes, turn on almost any music channel on the tube and see a band he likes, and go to almost any show and have a good time.

This means that, while others may have better musical “taste” than Bobble Tiki, he is usually happier.

Happiness goes a long way. People seem to forget that.

Good taste in general isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Bobble Tiki likes crappy wine — you know what that means? He doesn’t need to spend a hundred dollars a bottle to have a good time. Bobble Tiki likes crappy food — you know what that means?  He can find pleasure at El Gaucho or DQ. Bobble Tiki likes crappy television — you know what that means? He doesn’t have to pop for HBO.

Bobble Tiki’s life is all together happier because he has no taste. It’s a tradeoff he is happy to make.

The Swinos fall in here somewhere, Bobble Tiki swears. The band will play McCabe’s American Music Cafe next Thursday during the club’s “Nothing But Rock” series, and Bobble Tiki jumped on the story like a lap dog in heat. Somewhere in all Bobble Tiki’s excitement over writing about his lack of taste, he got carried away. Sure, Bobble Tiki’s a lowbrow, but that doesn’t mean the Swinos are purely a lowbrow band.

The Swinos, if anything, are purists. While rocking out balls out may not get you where it once did among snooty music geeks, the Swinos have mastered the quintessential elements of rock ’n’ roll — the way it was meant to be. They’re loud. They’re fast.

They’re drunk. And they don’t give a crap what you think.

In Bobble Tiki’s book, this makes the Swinos grade A fun.

Take ’em or leave ’em.

The Weekly Volcano hasn’t caught up with the Swinos since they released their last record, Piss Drunk and Spinnin’. That was a year ago, and it’s been far too long since we’ve scribbled anything about Bremerton’s favorite mix of Merle and Motorhead. Here’s an excerpt from a chat Bobble Tiki had with Dru Brinkenhoff, the Swinos’ lead singer.

WEEKLY VOLCANO: What are you expecting from McCabe’s?

DRU BRINKENHOFF: Drunken virgin princesses submitting themselves to the doctrines of Swinification.

VOLCANO: What has the reaction been to Piss Drunk and Spinnin’? Do you still like it?

BRINKENHOFF: Yeah, we’re all real pleased with it — reaction’s been very positive; we’re just starting to work on material for our next recording.

VOLCANO: What are you working toward now?

BRINKENHOFF: A buzz.

VOLCANO: You list your influences as Jim Beam, Wild Turkey, fast food, Vicodin and T&A on MySpace — which is the best? How do they all work together to inspire the Swinos?

BRINKENHOFF: They’re all great on their own, but it’s the combination of all in succession that makes this recipe for disaster so inviting and inspirational.

VOLCANO: Who would win in a cage match — the Swinos or Lindsay Lohan all coked out of her mind? Why?

BRINKENHOFF: Depends on how coked up the Swinos are.

VOLCANO: What’s more boring — preseason football or missionary sex? Why?

BRINKENHOFF: Missionary sex definitely — at least with football there’s a lot of ball fondling.

VOLCANO: What does Bremerton need more of?

BRINKENHOFF: Steel Reserve Ice and toilet paper?

VOLCANO: What does Bremerton need less of?

BRINKENHOFF: Bremerton is the soul nucleus of the world; without it there would be no body hair of any kind.

As always, Bobble Tiki doesn’t care what you do this week because he doesn’t even know you. Hopefully Bobble Tiki’s lack of regard for your existence isn’t surprising anymore. As Bobble Tiki’s prophetic father used to say, “It is what it is.” Don’t take it personally. Check out www.weeklyvolcanospew.com for Breakfast with Bobble Tiki, now every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday, and consider yourself lucky not to be on the short list of friends Bobble Tiki calls when he’s too drunk to drive. 

[McCabe’s American Music Cafe,  with Society Says and Bent Penny, Thursday, Aug. 23, 9 p.m., 2611 Pacific Ave., Tacoma,  www.myspace.com/mccabesamc]