When the important question begs, “Where’d you get your body from?” the most obvious, and of course intellectual, answer would be, “Got it from my mama!” Trust me. I know this because Will I Am told me (very loudly) as I entered the door’s of Lakewood’s Green Pup Sports Bar on 84th Street South. Their sound system ROCKS.



With two men playing pool, a couple of bar patrons playing pull tabs, and beautiful Dalin behind the bar, I felt all eyes on me as I approached Dalin’s smiling face and she asked me how I was doing. I was honest with her and told her I had just eaten the nastiest plate of Korean food and needed something right away to cleanse my palate. I needed something familiar and comforting. I needed something that would bring my senses back to a familiar place. I needed a Bud Light, and I needed it badly.



Dalin hooked me up with one of those cool Bud Light bad boys, and patiently helped me decide what cheap, fried, greasy bar menu item I was going to ingest next. The hairy, bearded gentleman next to me declared repeatedly, “Green Pup has the best food in town. Yessiree. In my opinion, the best food in town. Green Pup has the best food … best food in town …  best food …” Well, you get my point. He thought the Green Pup had the best food in town, in case you didn’t catch that.



If only I’d been hungrier I would’ve gladly gone for the daily special, which changes every day but just happened to be a 12-inch, two-topping pizza and a pitcher of domestic draft (oh hell yeah) for only $14.99. Instead I counted the items within the Green Pup that advertised beer in any shape or fashion. With all the flags, mirrors, posters, and blow-up NASCAR numbers, I was easily discombobulated and retreated defeated to my Bud Light. I curse you damn beer signage! Next time, you’re counted, and you’re MINE.

Green Pup Sports Bar

2310 84th St S., Lakewood, 253.584.5600



Beer: Cheap, cool, and perfect.

Food: Variety at a great price



Bar Exam Dive Grade: A-