I’m not very cool — nor have I ever claimed to be.



I’m not hip, so by definition I’m not a hipster — and plus I don’t like wearing pants that tight.

I’m not extremely popular, either, probably because I don’t really care for large groups of people and the herbal jazz cigarettes make me shy.



The Cave Singers are nothing like me. They’re everything I’m not and more.



Like a lot of people, I became aware of the Cave Singers, a somewhat new Seattle-bred mix of folk and Fleetwood Mac, because of the band’s guitarist — Derek Fudesco. Fudesco, as you may recall, played bass in the Murder City Devils and Pretty Girls Make Graves. The bands are two of my favorite ever to come out of Seattle (with a definite advantage going to the Devils — who are like gods in my book.)



When Pretty Girls Makes Graves broke up in 2007, it wasn’t long before you started hearing about a band Fudesco had started with vocalist Pete Quirk of Hint Hint notoriety and drummer Marty Lund of Cobra High. That band was the Cave Singers, and the threesome will hit Bob’s Java Jive this Friday, Aug 1. Far mellower than any of the bands Fudesco is known for, the Cave Singers should still manage to entrance the Java Jive crowd — as long as they don’t come expecting broken bottles or empty hearts. There won’t be any full on rock, but there should be plenty of musical talent on stage to make up for it. Fudesco, who’s taken up the guitar in the Cave Singers, along with the unique voice of Quirk (which teeters on whiny at times, but let’s not nitpick) and the mood setting drumming of Lund make the Cave Singers a band to take note of.



In fact, the Cave Singers are cool. Everyone knows it, and they probably do too. Fudesco, Lund and Quirk have well-earned reputations in the Seattle music scene, and that’s the reason Matador Records — the much revered label and former home of Pretty Girls Make Graves — offered to release the Cave Singers debut record, Invitation Songs, in September of ’07 — a mere three months after Pretty Girls Make Graves’ final show.



I believe, by definition, when you’re swooped up by Matador like the last pair of retro tennis shoes at the Hipster Shoe Pavilion, that makes you cool, hip, and popular.



The Cave Singers seem to be all three.



For this reason, and so many more, I was nervous going into my interview with the band. I’m from Tacoma. Dudes like the Cave Singers, I figured — who carry significant weight in the ultra hip world of Seattle music — probably don’t have much time for peons like me. How was I to lift my coolness to their level? How were my questions supposed to be cool enough? What if they found out I don’t have ironic facial hair?



As it turned out, none of that really mattered. After agreeing to an interview late last week, the Cave Singers dicked me — leaving this hack journalist from T-town high and dry by the phone. It was hard to not hold this against them.



But I tried my best not to. I didn’t want one bad experience to lead to an unfair column. I contacted the band again, and again agreed on a time for an interview — this one much, much closer to my deadline. There was no way, I figured, the Cave Singers would bitch me around again. No matter how cool they are, or where they buy their hipster V-neck T-shirts, there was no way, I assumed, this band of atmospheric folk hipsters would f*** me over twice.

How wrong I was.



Whether the Cave Singers are too cool for the Weekly Volcano or simply not very good at keeping appointments and following through, I’m not sure. What I do know is they screwed me twice this week. While it’s not the first time an ultra hip band from Seattle has f***ed me over, it’s the first time one has come back for seconds and done it twice in a four-day period. The Cave Singers may be the coolest three guys I’ve ever “been with.”



The Cave Singers — Fudesco, Lund and Quirk — will play Bob’s Java Jive Friday, Aug 1. Even if they’re not my favorite people at the moment, the show (musically at least) should be one of this weekend’s high points.



Just don’t ask them for any favors.



[Bob’s Java Jive, The Cave Singers, Canon Canyon and the Solvents, Friday, Aug. 1, 8 p.m., $5, 2102 S. Tacoma Way, Tacoma, 253.475.9843]