Actually, Trevor’s business card reads: Trevor Richard Hanlin — Free Lance Political Economist & Business Plan Consultant, but I was afraid that’d scare you off as part of this week’s Trouble with DeRosa title. It certainly gave me the heebie-jeebies as I read it to myself that day at The Spar. Shoot, I wish he would’ve warned me before handing over his card for me to read, I would’ve packed a sack lunch for the literary expedition I was about to embark on. I mean it took me almost my entire morning to read that career title. Free Lance Political Economist & Business Plan Consultant? What the fuck does that even mean?

I waited for Trevor to complete his shift behind The Spar’s café counter, grab a beer, and shimmy up to my table before I unloaded my usual set of questions.

STEPH DEROSA: Free Lance is two words?

TREVOR HANLIN: Yeah, people have pointed that out before. In the American-English dictionary it is one word, but in the British-English dictionary it’s two words.

DEROSA: Ah, those Brits and their funny words with their funny spellings. It’s kind of like the Canadians putting a “U” in words where we American’s don’t. Like in the word “flavour”. (Even as I type this, spell check wants to correct it to “flavor”.)

HANLIN: Yes, Canadian-English spelling is a blend of British and American conventions.

DEROSA: We Americans also like to add our own slang words to the dictionary each year, such as “staycation.”

HANLIN: My favorite is seeing George Bush’s own invention of “stratergy” added to the dictionary, or Colbert’s “truthiness.”

DEROSA: So, brainiac, what does a Free Lance Political Economist & Business Plan Consultant do, anyway?

HANLIN: I do market research and analysis having to do with politics, economics, and sociology. I know normally that wouldn’t tie all together, but it does. This goes into creating business plans for individuals or businesses. It really is interesting, trust me.

DEROSA: Meh.

HANLIN: That’s been added to the dictionary, too. I believe “meh” is credited as being created by The Simpsons television show.

DEROSA: I’m going to need one of The Spar’s very cold beers after this conversation.

HANLIN: Intelligence has caused a headache for you, hasn’t it?

DEROSA: I think so. Can someone get me a beer? I need to numb the pain.

[The Spar, 2121 N. 30th St., Tacoma, 253.272.2122]