Once in a while I get a chance to stop into Puget Sound Pizza and actually relax. Most of the time I’m hurriedly ordering something “to go,” only to run into some I know, making me wish I WASN’T in a hurry and could actually stop to visit more. Owner Jim Higgins and his PSP crew are always so accommodating. Whether I’m planning an event, taking the family out to breakfast, or being schlepped along on some unobtainable quest to reclaim Pappi Swarner’s youth — PSP is #1 in my little black worn-out book. As I take a potty break from either the beer Martin keeps in front of me or the chocolate cake shots Jim heckles me into swigging down, I relax from the hasty life I lead. Oh my, I can certainly create a hectic life for myself.



I think sometimes I put too much on myself to make other people happy, thus inevitably resulting in a rushed life and ultimate burnout. Well, that’s where I am now. Burnout.



I’m not talking about my husband, daughter, mom or dad. Those people are exempt from any burnout mode. I’m talking about everyone else in life*. I used to be a “yes” girl. (Just ask the guys I went to college with. Hey-O!) If there was a task to be done, I did it. A cause to be nurtured, I coddled. An event to be chaired, I called it mine. A friend with an emotional scrape, I cleansed it. Eventually I figured out that I couldn’t be everything to everyone. I had to come to the realization that I could, without damaging repercussion, say “no.”



Ever feel yourself needing to do “social laundry”? You pilfer through your mental list of allies and put some on the back burner. They’ll still get your hokey Christmas card with the posed picture on the front, but they won’t get the Hickory Farms yard-o-beef, that’s for sure. It’s not that you don’t care for those people, or those tasks, it’s just time for you to step back and focus on the people and things who appreciate you — the ones who don’t take you for granted. No, I’m not expecting flowers, candy, and a marching band to feel gratitude. What I do expect is appreciation, and maybe a little leeway if things aren’t to your exact liking.



The Giving Tree will be my next tattoo. I feel the book. I am the tree.



I have my core soul mates, my cheerleaders for times like this. My husband tells me how awesome I am and then advises me to raise hell. He’s in this relationship purely for the entertainment value, I’m sure. JCB brings over a bottle of wine and then scoops my kid away so I can fester alone. And then there’s The KAke. She gets more worked up about my issues than I do, which in turn makes me laugh and calms me down. The other day she actually texted me the lyrics from Jay-Z’s “99 Problems.” I love my little cheer squad.



As for the “social laundry” I’ve had to do in the last month or so, it’s all coming out clean. All I can do is put it on the spin cycle and rest upon the machine. (C’mon, don’t tell me you’ve never done that.)



*Except my Volcano family. I love you guys. Please don’t fire me.