Bobble Tiki isn’t wearing underwear right now. If Bobble Tiki could have one single wish — anything in the entire world — it would be for a frosty fresh breeze to find its way up Bobble Tiki’s grass skirt, and stay put.

Ohhhh, how nice that would be.

Bobble Tiki is hot, and we’re not talking sexually. Especially at the moment. Sweat beads down Bobble Tiki’s face — which looks like it’s on the verge of giving its own concession speech right before it shrivels and dies. Bobble Tiki isn’t wearing a shirt — nor has he been at any point today. The nipples on Bobble Tiki’s aging man boobs point toward the floor, and a majestic river of sweat runs between them, pooling like a swampy fishing hole before overflowing down Bobble Tiki’s great beer gut.

And Bobble Tiki is loving it.

Just like last week, undeterred by the heat wave forecasts and runs on fans at Wal-Mart, Bobble Tiki loves the sun. Bobble Tike loved it last week when it was 80 degrees, so you know damn well Bobble Tiki’s going to be in strong favor of temperatures flirting with triple digits.
That’s just Bobble Tiki’s style.

Another thing that is Bobble Tiki’s style is “Transformers.” Three times now Bobble Tiki has dragged Mrs. Tiki to the theater, and each time Bobble Tiki leaves a little happier, and Mrs. Tiki leaves a little closer to a “trial separation.”

Bobble Tiki thinks robots are about as cool as it gets. Except for aliens or zombies, Bobble Tiki sees robots as, probably, the coolest thing ever. When Bobble Tiki was a little Tiki, he had an erector set. Then later in life Bobble Tiki saw “Robocop.” Bobble Tiki has been stuck on robots ever since.

On Saturday, July 14, Robots vs. Humans — the band — will inject a little pubescent emo rock into Jazzbones, hopefully resulting in a good crowd, a good time, and far less DUIs, blackouts, unplanned pregnancies, unplanned upchucks, and over-service than Jazzbones’ Monday Karaoke Night.

Formerly Garvey Switch, Robots vs. Humans, judging by the band’s MySpace page —  www.myspace.com/ robotsvshumans — centers around brothers Tyrus and Rusty Trusky, who sing and play guitar, respectively.

(Bobble Tiki Fun Challenge: Try saying Tyrus and Rusty Trusky three times fast. Good. Now try going through school as Tyrus and Rusty Trusky.)

Since there wasn’t a wealth of information available about Robots vs. Humans, but Bobble Tiki was interested anyway since they have “robot” in their name, Bobble Tiki spoke with Ryan Finley, the band’s guitarist.

BOBBLE TIKI: Jazzbones.com says: “formerly Garvey Switch.” Is that true, or is this a different band? I notice the two Truskys remain, but the others have changed. Why the new faces?

RYAN FINLEY: Robots vs. Humans formed from the core members of Garvey Switch, brothers Tyrus and Rusty Trusky and Ryan Finley. Tyrus, Rusty and Ryan played together in Garvey Switch for some four years, and sometime after Garvey Switch ceased to be active they all decided they wanted to get back to playing together again except doing something different, something new. It just happened that Tyrus had hit something of a stride in his songwriting and had a whole batch of brand new songs on deck and ready to go. The lineup was completed with Ben Poland, a long time friend and former band mate of Ryan’s, and Ian Smith on synth, a friend and sometimes collaborator of Ryan’s.

TIKI: Sound wise, there’s nothing available to preview on MySpace. Once again, is RvH similar to GS sonically, or are they different beasts?

FINLEY: Robots vs. Humans is in some senses more conventional and in others less. Garvey Switch was known for complex guitar interplay and bombastic soloing. Robots vs. Humans aims to keep arrangements simpler, cleaner, and purer — allowing more room for the songs to speak. On the other hand, Robots vs. Humans is constantly trying to stretch the format of the 3-to-4 minute rock song, experimenting with arrangements that stray from the expected.

TIKI: Do you have plans for a record?

FINLEY: We are going to be gigging our new set throughout the summer, and based upon our experiences playing the songs before live audiences we will make whatever adjustments necessary and begin recording our first EP in the Fall for release in early ’08.

TIKI: How long have you been around?

FINLEY: We first started working through songs in February 2007 and finalized our lineup May 2007

TIKI: Where is this band going? What are your goals?

FINLEY: Besides the obvious (world domination) we hope to make music that we believe in and hopefully others will believe in it too.

TIKI: Why are you in this band?

FINLEY: These guys are some of my best friends. I get to hang out with them, play music I love, and pass that on to other people. Why would I not be in this band?

TIKI: If people know one thing about RvH, what should it be?

FINLEY: We aren’t faking it. We simply are not clever enough.

TIKI: What can people expect from the show at Jazzbones?

FINLEY: Besides some first gig butterflies? Old friends striking out on a new adventure.

As always, Bobble Tiki doesn’t care how you spend your weekend, because he doesn’t even know you. Actually, that’s not true. You met Bobble Tiki one time at a party, but Bobble Tiki blacked out and was playing nude bocce. Either way, unless you can explain to Bobble Tiki why Mrs. Tiki doesn’t consider “Transformers” a film, than he’s sure he doesn’t want to be reintroduced. Besides, Bobble Tiki’s got some burgers on the grill. He’s got to jet.

[Jazzbones, with Trip The Light Fantastic and Colonies, Saturday,July 14, 4 p.m., all ages, no cover, 2803 Sixth Ave., TAcoma, 253.396.9169]