Stress is not a disease.  It is a physical response to things that upset, worry, or threaten you.  You cannot catch stress, but almost everyone suffers from it to some degree.

For the general population, the top 10 life events that contribute to stress are a spouse's death, divorce, marriage separation, jail term, death of a close relative, injury or illness, marriage, being fired from a job, marriage reconciliation, and retirement.

However, on top of those general stressors, the military spouse has to deal with increased deployments, increased danger to his or her spouse as well as being a single parent during the spouse's absence.

Although there are thousands of resources on stress and how to cope with it, there are some general things that individuals can do to cope with stress that most of the sources agree upon.

• The most important thing a military spouse can do to help with stress is to be in a relationship where the marriage is strong and the spouses are supportive of each other.  Have a strong family unit.  Do everything you can to keep your relationship in a good place, and when your spouse deploys, you will be able to cope better with his or her absence, said Dennis Orthner, a professor and the associate director for Policy Development and Analysis at the Jordan Institute for Families at the University of North Carolina, in Chapel Hill.   

"Make sure you have couple time and personal time with your spouse as often as possible before they leave," said Orthner, who has compiled several studies for the Army dealing with stress and deployments. "Spouses who handle deployments the best are the ones who know they have support and that their relationship is strong."

• Learn how to say no.  When a spouse deploys, you have the added responsibilities of the second parent.  Learn to agree to only things that you know you can do.

• Do simple things such as: focus on the positive, take walks, exercise regularly, garden, get enough sleep, eat a healthy diet, and reduce your intake of caffeine and sugar.  Although these things apply to your general health, they are also important in reducing stress.  Keep busy but do not get overwhelmed with life; it will cause more, not less, stress.

• Fourth, avoid people who stress you.  If you know that a women's group is filled with women who are negative complainers, who gossip, and exaggerate and this stresses you, do not meet with those people.  Find someone at church, or a gym, or a Family Readiness Group to pal around with instead.

• Fifth, try yoga. The ultimate goal of yoga is to reach complete peacefulness of body and mind, helping you relax and manage stress and anxiety, according to physicians at Mayo Clinic - www.mayoclinic.com/health/yoga.  There are several yoga techniques - controlled breathing, meditation, physical movement, mental imagery, and stretching - that help reduce stress.  Also, yoga helps you to sleep more soundly, reduces blood pressure and heart rate, and reduces muscle tension.