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3 DRINK MINIMUM: Jasmine Mongolian Grill

Steph Derosa gets the scoop

They don't like it when you take pictures of the dragonheads.

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As I was exiting the doors of the Federal Way Commons (formerly known as SeaTac Mall), I noticed a dining establishment taking up an eighth of the block called Jasmine Mongolian Grill.  I was too early to physically open the doors, but I did manage to press my greasy nose up against the glass and peer inside the dark, unlit room.  Behold the Asian jewels, porcelain trinkets, dragonheads and neon beer signage!  I saw what appeared to be liquor bottles stacked up along the back wall, a glorious space filled with seating, and a big MF'ing Mongolian grill buffet line!  Had I died and finally gone to a place where gluttony is encouraged?  Alcohol, beer, AND a massive array of food for me to partake in copious amounts?

Drink One: Asahi Beer (bartender's Choice) - We returned later that night to feast among Federal Way citizens and dine on Mongolian-themed, make-it-yourself noodle bowls. 

After the barely-English-speaking server asked us if we, "like it hot?" she passionately encouraged us to take a scoop of something if we did, but if not, then a different scoop of something else with only a half a scoop of something else.  But then again, if we DID want it hot, she told us another way we could do it was a little scoop of something, along with a big scoop of something totally different than whatever the f*** she said before. What in the hell did she just say? I needed a beer. Luckily, she delivered.

Drink Two: Tsing Tao (most popular drink within last hour) - Oh, side note: Those liquor bottles in the back of the restaurant? The ones I saw earlier that resembled a full bar?  They were flavored syrup bottles for the latte machine.  Yep.  Not only did I have to suffer with the consequences of not taking the right scoop of something for my noodle bowl, but now I had no liquor. 

Drink Three: Sake (My choice) - Sorry, folks.  Fermented rice wine was the closest I could get to liquor in this place.  Note to self:  Bring your own liquor, don't take the extra scoop, and whatever you do - DON'T let them catch you taking pictures of their dragonhead collection.

[Jasmine Mongolian Grill, 1948 S Commons, Federal Way, 253.529.9566]

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