Every once in a while I get a little nudge-nudge e-mail from you lovely readers inquiring about my love life.



In the past, I’ve purposely chosen not to write about this topic because that’s the one section of my existence that I like to keep private.



But there’s a stellar and excellent reason behind that decision:



From my experiences, I’ve found that the true dating scene here in Tacoma should be more commonly known as a cesspool when it comes to men.



Now there a couple of ways we can define the word “cesspool,” so let me be clear about my usage of this all-too-fitting word:



Cesspool: Any place of moral filth or immorality.



Yep. I said it. Moral filth or immorality.



After some of life’s most recent experiences in this cesspool, I’m extra salty about the topic of dating, and I’ll never, EVER, be able to get over what some men think they can get away with in this city.



I’m in no way trying to suggest that every man in Tacoma is bad. The optimist in me has to believe that good men do indeed exist. I just haven’t found that batch yet.



You can accuse me of not going to the right places, and to that end I can say that within this city I’ve hung out in circles that are high society, lowbrow and everything in between, and only come to the same conclusions.



I really can’t imagine that I’m the only gal in Tacoma who feels this way, which is why the rest of my column today will be dedicated to tips on how to survive this cesspool.



First of all, ladies, guard yourself with confidence. Sure, that might be a turnoff to some guys, but do you really want to be with some dud that’s full of insecurity?



If you get even a faint notion that he’s hooking up with someone else across town, or even on your block, KNOW FOR CERTAIN that in this city, he definitely is.



When there’s a mere suggestion that he’s a player or a wannabe, don’t be a hater, just simply move on.



If something amidst your divine instincts forces you to question him about his dealings because you’re worried that he was lying in the first place: MAKE YOUR EXIT NOW! Go with what your gut tells you because in the city, I’d place high bets on the wager that your instincts are spot on.



When he claims that he’s falling for you, try not to get stars in your eyes until you’ve had enough experience with the guy to know that those words are fact, not get-in-your-pants fiction.



Speaking of, whatever you do, gals, don’t give it up in these early stages! If you happen to find out that the dude is a complete scumbag, it’s much easier to throw your fist in the air and walk away when no sexy time has lapsed.



If you indicate that you’re no longer interested in seeing the person, don’t question that decision later and step back into your old patterns. Something was telling you that the situation wasn’t good for you, and you have to trust that for self-preservation.



But all saltiness aside, I do have faith in the fact that there’s a good, intelligent, handsome, strong (and tall) man out there for me.



Until then, I’ll just be fending off the f***wads in my ivory tower.