Keeping up with the Joneses is a bitch. So when the owners of Mary’s Burger Bistro chose the noted Pacific Avenue for their new location, they had some big shoes to fill. After delaying the opening more than two weeks, the new burger joint finally debuted last Wednesday, and of course, the Weekly Volcano was on the scene.

With all the hype that’s been given to the place, I thought it’d be brimming with folks when I walked in at 9 a.m. on Wednesday morning. But to my surprise, Sharkface and I were the only customers throughout our entire stay. Maybe it was because their grand opening sign was outside, lying on the sidewalk.

Obviously, the first thing I noticed was the amazing renovations. The walk-up, pick-up window out front was a great idea. Big props to Mary for choosing the rad color scheme. The tile floor is checked with red, gray, blue and deep purple, my high school color. Go Middies!

The corrugated aluminum counter and black leather stools give the whole place a retro feel. The tables are tall. No booths. And there’s even a small coffee bar just to the right when you walk through the door. The ceiling is open with metal beams, track lighting, and hanging lamps. They even have a dangling glass ball, most likely purchased from the glass blowing studio next door. This spot definitely lives up to its “Bistro” title.

As we walked in, there were three employees standing with eager smiles, one of whom was the owner’s husband. I ordered the Ultimate Burrito and got it in no time at all. For only $3.99 you can choose from ham, bacon or sausage, with hash browns, two eggs, green pepper, and grilled onion. All the goods were snuggled in a flour tortilla with some yummy salsa on the side. It was so delicious, and other than Nick’s Burrito in Cali, Mary’s makes the best breakfast burrito I’ve ever had. It had huge pieces of chunky sausage, and the egg was wrapped alongside the tortilla, like an omelet. This thing was massive, but how stoked was I when I rediscovered the leftovers in my fridge later that day? Very. I love ordering the biggest thing on the menu and using the remainder for my nibbling pleasure throughout the day.

This isn’t the only great breakfast item. Mary’s also offers up croissant sandwiches and an amazing French Toast Sandwich. It has specialty grilled bread with egg, cheese, your choice of meat, and is served with a side of syrup. There were also some tempting pastries and bagels I’ll definitely be going back for, and an extensive coffee menu. After she saw I was finished, Mary came over and packed up my leftovers herself. Then she handed me a free chocolate chip cookie for the road. For those of you who’ve been lucky enough to get one on the house, you know how tasty her homemade cookies are. I felt like it was my mom handing me my packed lunch for the day, and I left with a smile.

Lunch on opening day didn’t go as smoothly. People waited for an hour for their orders, so I decided to go the following day and see if they’d worked out any of the kinks. We walked in at noon on the second day of business to see about four tables filled. It took only 10 minutes to get my Green Pepper and Onion Burger with fries and a shake ($7.99) and a single hamburger for Sharkface ($1.75).

When ordering, the peppy cashier informed us, “Our strawberries are so fresh,” referring to my milkshake ($2). It was only a few minutes later when we saw her with a bulk-size bag of frozen strawberries. I let it slide since the shake was delicious anyhow. The whipped cream on top made it even better.

My burger was awesome with Swiss cheese, grilled onions, green peppers, and light horseradish mayonnaise on a Kaiser roll. The patty was thick, and the roll made the whole sandwich. The fries were mediocre and could have been cooked a little longer. So ask for your fries well done if you want them cooked through.

The great thing about Mary’s Burger Bistro is the menu. You can get a single burger for $1.25 or a double for $1.75. You can choose from Angus beef, breaded chicken, salmon, or vegetarian patties for $4.99. They also have different soups each day of the week and a variety of salads. Unfortunately, during my visit their cooler was broken, so no salads until next time. A specialty hot dog on a stadium roll will run you $2.99, or you can grab a secret sauce burger with Mom’s secret sauce. Shhhh …

After lunch, I was brought yet another free cookie. Mary informed me they came straight from her other Tacoma business, S&P Shakers Deli on 27th St. Overall, this place is great, and what town couldn’t use another burger joint? The food is delightful, and the employees are even more so. It’s a great atmosphere with good people and chop-lickin’ burgers.

[Mary\'s Burger Bistro, 2301 Pacific Ave., downtown Tacoma]