Today I received my first letter. I hadn’t solicited yet for reader input, but it found its way to my editor.  Fortunately, he sent it my way while I was having severe writer’s block and about to drink myself into a stupor (who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth). This letter was from an owner of a small Tacoma restaurant who was questioning her solution to a pretty sticky situation between a server and a customer. Without printing it word for word, hopefully I can do this scenario justice.

It is a lunch shift not unlike any other lunch shift but a little slower than average. We’ll call our server David. David has three tables. The table in question hosts a couple, a man and a woman. David is slightly distracted. He has had a difficult morning and is doing his best to overcome his negative feelings. His service is not bad, just maybe not as attentive as it could be.

The couple feels slighted, and they are very unhappy. They pay their bill and leave a token two cents for David as a tip. As they walk out the door, David discovers the tip and is enraged. He runs to the door and says, “I think you need this more than I do!” and then proceeds to throw the two pennies they left out onto the sidewalk. This action does not go unnoticed by the couple.

A few days later, the owner receives an e-mail from the customers detailing the fateful lunch. By this time, David has come clean already to his boss about what happened. He feels horrible about his actions, but defends his service of these two customers as less than stellar, but acceptable.

In the e-mail, the customer’s account of the lunch differs slightly from the server’s version, but from what I can tell, unless there was a third party to observe the encounter, it is difficult to know what really happened. Needless to say they were appalled and asked that the owner fire the server for his unprofessional behavior.

Now this is where the owner had difficulty responding to the customer and wanted my thoughts. You see, according to her David has always been a wonderful employee and server. His customers love him and would be devastated if he were to leave. Also, the restaurant employs only four people so firing him would reduce the owner’s work force by 25 percent.

After much thought, her return e-mail explained David’s many positive qualities and his profound regret for his unprofessional behavior. He had never received a negative comment from a customer until now. She also mentioned how difficult it is to be a small business owner with limited employee resources to draw from. She thought about offering the customers a sizeable gift certificate to return when David was not working, but in hindsight decided not to. In her mind, these were lost customers and they were never going to return, no matter what she offered.

Did she do the right thing? Should she have fired David? Would they have returned if she had? There are many factors they need to be considered here. For one, David could tell from the moment the customers sat down that they didn’t feel comfortable with him as a server. Maybe they too were having a bad day.

We all know David was very wrong for acting out his frustrations on a customer. They could be the biggest jerks to ever set foot in a restaurant, but the server should suck it up, move on and bitch about it over drinks with his friends later that evening. According to David’s boss, he had grown from this experience and now uses Prozac and interpretive dance to deal with his feelings. Just kidding, I made that part up.   

In my opinion, unless you walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, it’s hard to really know. The owner did the best she could for HER situation. She reprimanded David and graciously returned the customer’s e-mail while giving them some insight into a business that is more gray than black and white. However, I would have sent the customers a gift certificate anyway. Who doesn’t like free stuff?

Eat out Tacoma. We need your love.



Sandee Glib has worked in the restaurant and hospitality industry for more than 12 years as a server, bartender, cook and owner. Her opinions are expressly her own and she is always right.