Thing: Everything Buffalo

Place: Bruceski's Buffalo Wings and Pizza

City: DuPont

Opened: 2005

Seats: 20

Owner: Yon Kim

Obvious specialty: Buffalo wings and pizza

Buffalo meat present: No

Buffalo, NY correspondent: Eric Curley

With delivery available to all of DuPont and Fort Lewis, Bruceski's Buffalo Wings and Pizza stays plenty busy. And from what owner Yon Kim tells me, her restaurant also keeps a ton of regular customers on the roster.

"There's Nathan, Marie and Grayson just to name a few. I start worrying when I don't see them for a while," Kim tells me. "But then they come back and they've usually been deployed or away on training since most are military personnel."

To be honest, missing customers should be the least of Kim's concerns.  What about all the buffalo? Does she keep them all in the back storage area? Isn't she ever afraid they might stampede?

What also should be of concern are genetics. As far as I know, evolution has not served us buffalos with wings, so neither should Bruceski's. Any buffalo with wings has obviously been genetically mutated and should not be deep fried and tossed in delicious spicy wing sauce. As yummy as these odd pieces of meat may be, it's just wrong.

Which brings up another concern of mine: How are large buffalo supposed to fly with such tiny wings? Sounds dangerous, if you ask me.

To possibly help me with my buffalo concerns, I contacted my Buffalo, New York, correspondent, Eric Curley.

DEROSA: Here in Washington State we have a teriyaki joint open on every corner. Is it the same in Buffalo, except with buffalo wing joints?

CURLEY: Yes. There are VERY few restaurants in Buffalo that don't serve wings. They're just called chicken wings, though ... 'cause ... well, you're already IN Buffalo.

DEROSA: You ever see buffalo roaming the streets?

CURLEY: No, but we do have a bunch of statues of buffalo scattered all over the city. Drivers here are bad enough as it is.  We don't need to throw wildlife into the mix.

After this I asked Eric more stupid questions pertaining to Buffalo, New York, and buffalo meat, but he was obviously very busy (being my celebrity superstar correspondent can do that to a person) because he hung up on me real quick-like.

Look, even though I was initially concerned with the harming of any buffalo, their wings, buffalo wing-eating customers and why Eric Curley ignored my phone calls the whole week after our conversation, I still ordered myself some Bruceski's buffalo wings.

All I can say is: More, please!

[Bruceski's Buffalo Wings and Pizza, 1584 McNeil St. #100, DuPont, 253.912.4305]