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TROUBLE WITH DEROSA: Diane R. Lachel

Government and Community Relations manager for Click! Network runs into Trouble

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For 12 years, ever since Click!’s conception in 1997, Diane Lachel has kept an office seat warm, and a congenial disposition in Click!’s home base in the Tacoma Public Utilities building.  For the last five of those years, Diane has witnessed Tacoma area cable subscribers save over (gasp!) $107 million dollars.  With Click! on the scene — a fairly competing cable alternative — other cable companies have had to lower their prices, thus giving all of us TV addicts huge savings.   Oh, murder — I sound like a commercial, don’t I?  Someone instigate immature rapport, and quickly!

DIANE LACHEL: Who is this little one by your side?

DEROSA: Oh, that’s my daughter.  She’s out of school for the summer, so she’s tagging along for another month.

LACHEL: So, she’s your intern?

DEROSA:Well, I suppose a 6-year-old could write for the Volcano.

LACHEL: That’s at least true for your column. Do you have any questions for me?

DEROSA: Yeah, I do.  I’d like to know how in the hell you’re able to be cheaper than Comcast, yet have better channels and customer service?

LACHEL: We’re basically non-profit, so we’re not really out to make a buck.  The money we do make, we put back into the business, bettering the equipment.

DEROSA: Ah, OK.  Got it.  I see you have a ton of channels, 50 being HD, but only two are porn-related.  How’s that?

LACHEL: Well, we have Playboy and Spice.  Isn’t that enough?

DEROSA: Have your customer service reps noticed an influx of calls due to the nature of your obscenely low porn channel count?

LACHEL: Not really, no.  Wait a second…what did you say your name was again?

DEROSA: I’m sure I have a very common name.  There are probably a lot of Steph DeRosas calling here.  Right?  Requesting more porn channels? 

LACHEL: That’s OK; we get a lot of repeat callers every month.  Some of them even have their favorite representatives they like to talk to.  All customers are important here.
 
DEROSA: My favorite representative is any one of them that will fulfill my request.  In HD.  A new porn channel in HD, please.

LACHEL: Remember, Steph, this is a government agency.  We’re part of Tacoma Power.  I thought you were here to seriously interview me.

DEROSA: I am serious.

LACHEL: Yeah and I’m seriously glad your daughter isn’t homeschooled, and the summer’s almost over.

[Click! Network, 3628 S. 35th St., Tacoma, 253.502.8900]

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