Note: While this is a slow week for movies, I'm just way too swamped to review a trailer for an upcoming movie. So, I've asked my 13-year-old cousin, Gavin McKinney, to review The Warrior's Way for me. Enjoy. - Rev. Adam McKinney
OMG, you guys! Do you want to see The Warrior's Way with me? One word: Ninjas! Two words: Ninjas and cowboys! Together!
I just watched the preview, and it looks AMAZING! OK, so, like, there's this ninja. And he's the Coolest Ninja out of all the ninjas. All of these other ninjas keep popping up out of nowhere and they're all like, "Let's fight!" And he's just like, "Whatevs."
AND THEN HE CUTS THEM IN HALF!
But then his sensei is all like, "You're so awesome, why don't you kill this BABY?"
And the Cool Ninja's all like, "UH-UH, sensei!" So he goes to live with the cowboys for some reason.
OH! But, hey, another thing: When the Cool Ninja is fighting all of the other lame ninjas, he does it, like, in super slow motion. It looks really awesome.
Where was I? Oh yeah! So, he's hanging out with the cowboys in the desert, and they're all like, "Hey, most powerful ninja ever, would you like a GUN? So you could be EVEN MORE POWERFUL?" And the ninja's all, "Whatevs, cowboys. Wanna learn how to fight with ninja swords?" And he's carrying that baby on his back, ‘cause he didn't murder it back in Japan.
So, the sensei's really mad because the Cool Ninja didn't kill that baby, so he sends like A MILLION ninjas to go fight him and the cowboys. And the cowboys are all, "We're in this together," even though they've only known the Cool Ninja for, like, a week.
And there's this girl or whatever. But look: NINJAS! What more do you need to know?
It's Rated R, though ... maybe I can get my mom to take us to Unstoppable, and we can sneak into The Warrior's Way.
A movie about a train ... who would ever want to watch that?