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Parents of Multiples find community, understanding

Local military find connection

South Sound Parents of Multiples gather on the third Thursday of every month at Our Savior’s Lutheran Church in Tacoma for mutual support and encouragement. Photo credit: TPOM

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Being a parent is tough. Parenting in the military is tougher yet. Now imagine what it must be like to be a parent of twins, triplets, quadruplets - or more - all while serving your country in the U.S. military. For a few remarkable families in the South Sound, that is their day-to-day reality.

Thankfully, there's an organization of moms and dads who understand exactly what it's like.

A local nonprofit organization open to all parents of multiples in Pierce and Thurston counties, Tacoma Parents of Multiples (TPOM) was founded in 1969 to "share resources, information, joys and challenges of (parenting) identical and fraternal multiples," according to information on the group's website, www.tacomamultiples.org.

"TPOM has been a Godsend!" said Aubrey Racey, a homeschooling mother of seven children ages 3 to 14, including 3-year-old twin girls, Parker and Ainsley. Along with her husband, Cole, who is active-duty Navy, Racey found instant community in Tacoma Parents of Multiples.

"I didn't find TPOM until the twins were a couple months old, and as hard as it was to try to make my first meeting, it was so rewarding when I did," she said. "To be among other families going through the same thing at the same time was such validation."

Rachel Davis, a retired Army officer who, along with her husband, James, has a 5-year-old and 2-and-a-half-year-old triplets, echoes that sentiment. Being able to connect with other mothers of triplets, and even quadruplets, was very affirming.

"Just knowing that someone else had survived made me feel like I could do this, too," she said.

For first-time parents Air Force Staff Sgt. Jeff Heinert and his wife, Morgan, TPOM has been a lifeline.

"When you have twins, it's important to be around people who truly get it," said Morgan Heinert. "Military families have the added challenge of needing to create their own village, and that's what I have done with TPOM."  

With the twins nearing their first birthday, she added, "the (best) advice we got from TPOM was the first year is all about survival, and here we are! We survived!"

Tacoma Parents of Multiples meets on the third Thursday of every month from September through June at Our Savior Lutheran Church, located at 4519 112 St. E. in Tacoma. It offers a number of benefits to help families of multiples survive and thrive, including:

  • A Survivor 101 Class for new parents and parents-to-be of multiples
  • Play dates for club members
  • Special members-only events throughout the year
  • A preemie closet with preemie size clothes to loan to parents of tiny preterm multiples

One of the favorite benefits of belonging to TPOM is its "Meals After Multiples" program, which provides meals for families dealing with the birth of multiple babies at once.

"As parents who had no family near to bring us dinner," Heinert said. "The Meals After Multiples program ... was glorious."

Another well-loved benefit of this organization is its classified page and annual sale, both of which offer hard-to-find matching outfits and equipment specifically geared toward multiples, all at affordable prices.

Davis cites the organization's membership in the Northwest Association of Mothers of Twins Club as the benefit she values most.  Its bi-annual business meeting and convention - which brings together mothers of multiples from a five-state region including Alaska, Oregon, Idaho, Montana and Washington, as well as Canada - is a time of affirmation and connection that Davis tries not to miss.

The support provided by TPOM can hardly be overstated.

"I just can't say enough about how much they have helped me!" Heinert said.

To learn more, visit www.tacomamultiples.org.

Tacoma Parents of Multiples, 6:30 to 9 p.m., third Thursday of every month, September through June, Our Savior Lutheran Church, 4519 112 St. E., Tacoma, $30/year membership fee, tacomamultiples.org

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