Ever wondered how different things would have been if you had been taught how to communicate and take care of your marriage before your first child was born?

Some Air Force couples are getting an opportunity to do just that in a class being piloted at the McChord Clinic that is part of the Madigan Healthcare System.

Titled Becoming Parents Program, the course, which is funded as part of the Year of the Air Force Family initiative, is based on research compiled by Dr. Pam Jordan, a professor at the University of Washington.

"There is a lot of research being done on military families that deal with deployment, and the 24-hour around-the-clock missions that the military servicemembers are involved with," said Cyndi Mellor, a registered nurse in the McChord OB Clinic who is helping teach the course.  "Right now the course is being offered only to Air Force families, but eventually, we will offer it to Army couples as well.  We have about 18,000 families coming back from deployment. The birth rate will go up.  This class is intended to give parents them good communication skills before the baby is born."

The course comprises eight, three hour sessions which focus on the father and his role in the family.  The parents learn how to be a couple, which will make them better parents, she said.

"We want to help couples learn to communicate effectively before they become parents," she said.  "We want to teach them how to have fun after the baby is born, how to be good parents, and the importance of self-care.  If they don't take good care of themselves, they won't take good care of their baby."

The curriculum for Becoming Parents comprises in part, the following: couple care or relationship building:  effective communication skills, problem solving, hidden issues and expectations, family values and beliefs, and having fun as a couple; self-care: creating a healthy life-style, managing stress and fatigue, creating a support system, and balancing work and family; and baby care: baby cues and states, feeding the baby, comforting the baby and sleep patterns, and the basics of child growth and development.

Larissa Adams, and her husband of three years, Airman First Class Darren Adams, enrolled in the class because they wanted to learn.  She has found the problem solving portion of the class helpful, she said.

"I liked the speaker and listening exercises we did," Adams said. "I think it is nice that one person gets to say what is on their mind."

Also she has learned a lot about infant care and what to expect, she said.

"I have never cared for a newborn before," she said. "I have learned the six stages of a newborn's life...there are three stages when the baby is awake, and three stages when the baby is asleep.  I have learned when to get the baby up, and when the baby is still asleep.  And not to try to feed the baby when they are still sleeping."

In addition to the moms-to-be attending, the program requires that the father attend all sessions.  To ensure that the servicemembers in the family could attend the instructors met with the commanders and asked them how much time they would be willing to allow soldiers to be present during a duty day, and they scheduled the sessions based on their findings, she said.

The first session of the course, which started in July, is being attended by three couples, all in various stages of their pregnancies.  Each couple receives a course manual, snacks and goodies for the baby that includes swaddling blankets.  The couples do interactive exercises in the classroom, and they are given homework each week.

"In this class, there are not a lot of hands on activities such as how to change diapers..." said Vicki Lunghofer, a registered nurse at the McChord Clinic who works as the New Parent Support Program Manager.

"Instead we are teaching them infant cues and infant behaviors.  We use a lot of personal experiences."

Also, parents are introduced to inevitable scenarios that will occur after their baby is born, said Peggy Hager, a pediatrics registered nurse at the McChord Clinic.

"New parents don't think about things like feeding their baby," Hager said. "They don't recognize if their partner is having a bad day.  We teach them how to find someone they trust to take care of their baby when they need to do something for themselves."

Upon completion of the course, participants will get together for a reunion.

To enroll in the next session or the program scheduled to begin in late September, contact Cyndi Mellor at (253) 982-8717 or Vicki Lunghofer at 982-9040