We couldn't think of a better way to spend a winter night than on a hot date with ourselves listening to loud rock and roll and watching tough-as-nails roller derby chicks knocking each other on their ass. Yes, our Saturday night will be spent cheering on Dockyard Derby Dames characters such as Brat Capone, Booty Trapp, Ethel Vermin, Stranger Danger, Jail Bait Kait, Ida Spyze-Her and Harm A Knee. Saturday's expo bout features members of all four DYDD teams competing against the Rainy City Roller Dolls and the Rat City Rollergirls' Sockit Wenches in a double-header smackdown. We're talking tough babes on skates on a makeshift track. Wearing fishnets. Grunting. Slashing. Crashing. Then the bagpipes start. We're in the beer garden. Grunting. Slashing. Crashing. 

PIERCE COLLEGE, 6 P.M., $12, 9401 FARWEST DR. SW., LAKEWOOD, DOCKYARDDERBYDAMES.COM