It was frickin’ rainy as all get out, and I was sick to death of furniture shopping at The Old Cannery in Sumner. How many cheap pine coffee tables is this girl expected to gawk at it one afternoon? My limit was 26 cheap pine coffee tables, and I was done. Next on the agenda: beer, of course.

How convenient that there are not just one, but TWO dive bars within walking distance from The Old Cannery. Oh, don’t worry — I hit both. But you’ll have to wait till next week to hear about the Riverside Pub & Eatery. This week I’ll fill you in on Captain Jack’s. 

I walked into the rickety, low-ceiling, buccaneer-themed dwelling and immediately scored a cushioned circular booth for my beer-loving crew of friends. This wasn’t a hard task seeing as how the ever popular and usually scarce booths were plentiful inside Captain Jack’s.

Our server, Sue, immediately brought the gang some ice cold domestic draft beers and informed us that Penny (bar owner) had made homemade clam chowder that day. We just about fainted from relief — that cold beer and homemade clam chowder was the perfect thing to accompany our rainy day.

Captain Jack’s is a definite dive bar, and a dilapidated hole — to say the least. Each wall was not only a different color, but a different texture as well. Some were shingles, some were puttied, and some were flat painted. The carpet was atrocious and the bar tables were pieced together by someone who was apparently blind in one eye. Tacky beer signage, rope lights and buckets collecting rain from a leaky roof gave Captain Jack’s a beyond-passing dive bar score. But you know what? Given the worn-in appeal, the place was friendly, cozy, and gave us everything we needed. It gave us chowder. It gave us good service. And oh yeah, it gave us ice cold beeeeeeeeeeer.

Captain Jack's Bar & Grill

13501 Valley Ave. E., Sumner, 253.826.0679 

Service: Homemade clam chowder!

Beer: Cold, typical domestics that went well with our homemade clam chowder.

Food: homemade clam chowder!

Extra Credit: $1 JELL-O shots

Bar Exam Dive Grade: A+